"A simple dude with complex views.
From a social circle where girls come and go like good news.
That’s good parties and good booze.
Over good food, discuss religion and political views."
If you smoke and you’re around non-smokers, don’t smoke. If you don’t smoke and you’re around smokers, find something to do with your hands. Don’t recount dreams, unless they can be condensed into one sentence. When telling stories about people you barely know, have met once, or invented—refer to them as your “friends.” Buy a round of shots. Buy two rounds of shots.
Memorize jokes. Nod your head, but not too vigorously. Keep your mouth open and slightly smiling. Are you chewing gum? Keep your mouth closed, avoid smacking sounds. Slouch artistically, not lazily. This is done by making sure your neck doesn’t follow the line of your spine. Adjusting your pants too much will make you look suspicious. Point to the left and exclaim “Oh my god,” then pull them up quickly while no one is watching. When people ask what you saw, say “I thought someone was getting robbed.”
Cigarettes are devices she uses to mark time. It comforts her to know that just by holding something, she receives a temporary identity of Person Smoking a Cigarette. People on the other side of the street will see her smoking and know that she is part of the world of cigarette smokers. They will not ask questions. She has always feared that the world sees her as she sees herself—a strange, wandering thing that could easily become detached from gravity, float out of the atmosphere and into space without anyone noticing.
Many people with severe anxiety and/or depression are also anti-authoritarians. Often a major pain of their lives that fuels their anxiety and/or depression is fear that their contempt for illegitimate authorities will cause them to be financially and socially marginalized; but they fear that compliance with such illegitimate authorities will cause them existential death.
if your anger you
burn so brightly, you
rage like mars
to the point that I want
to call you a summer storm,
I want to characterize you by your anger
(mouth a summoning trumpet of war)
janus-faced and desirious
I want to make you
Lago Lucia, For Molly | this is my moon: mystery collection (via strayarrowpress)
I want to be pressed tightly
in-between all the darkest parts of you.
I want to meet the ravens
that circle around your pupils
while we gaze at each other like prey,
something to sink our teeth into.
Your talons carried me across your city
before I woke up soaked in you.
Worn, sleepy-eyed, stripped,
plucking feathers from my teeth,
sweating out the night.